I picked up a brush
made few surreal strokes
here and there
I painted on the canvas
of my heart
colouring the white
with rainbow paint
and suddenly I carried
tattooed on my beating
Fairy DustYour fairy dust gave me wings.
I play with shadows
and black rainbows of the night.
I kiss blossoms of early spring
in my endless flight.
I dance with moonlight and stars
and cross the sky like brave arrow.
dust turns to ashes
and bright light to flashes
love to ache
dream to wake
and I´m falling down.
invisible inkI write down my questions and screams
with an invisible ink
on the empty pages
of this old countless time-used book
of this lonesome manuscript from
Death to Rebirth
I found it
days and days ago
once upon a time
I cannot clearly recall
I found it in a sewer
found it in a trash
covered with ghosts of memories
of sighs and moonlight ash
I've written and drawn
words and lines
pictures of artristy
and finest delight
pages of a book from
Death to Rebirth
bear no mark
they are forever
empty and blank
dear, this book is mine
and it's yours
so write down your dreams
write down your hopes
all fears and screams
we just feel like writing
and there is nothing left to see
our pens leave no trace
and life is just a feeling of
slowly dying memory
echo of hope
written down with an invisible ink
oh, come and join me
in our Nothingness
let them forget
let us die out
without any regret
we never mattered
to Life or Death
to Time or Space
how to kill a flyyou killed a fly
without even knowing why
your hand moved
without even thinking
lead by instinct
just a reflex
a short spasm
and the fly is dead
that's how dreams are killed
that's how people often die
City StrayShe is a city stray...
her heart lies abandoned
among the graves of headless mannequins
in the city streets
where dim lights meet
people who cannot see.
her soul is drowning
in deep river-streets
and crushing pavement-waves
eyes are full of salt and smoke
breath is almost dead...
She is a city stray
child of blessed mists
child of bleeding fists
daughter of headless mannequins
born to be breathless
born to be helpless
born to live without senses
born to love cage and fances...
and still she thinks
and still she believes
But she´ll never see
But she´ll never know
what is beyond
what is behind
what is up
what is down
under and above...
Is almost blind...
Set AblazeAnd when childhood ends
you will ask
Who am I?
And when youth is gone
you will ask
Who am I?
And when old age comes
and death arrives
you will see
what you were
all those days
just a little piece of Nothing
one moment of Spark
one flash in the Dark
just a little piece of Everyting
in a maze
EscapeWorld is a prison with painted walls and music fills the air
Breath and Heartbeat...
Don´t you feel like a bird trapped in silver cage?
How it is to spread those heavy wings and fly?
There!...to the distance, towards fiery sky
I can´t remember...
Don´t you feel like a fox in burning lair?
With broken leg, howling in despair?
Without chance to escape...
All people I ever knew were born under crying stars
Those tears were golden and somewhat warm
And we hoped...they are ours to take
All people I ever knew were born under bleeding stars
Those tears were scarlet and somewhat warm
And we feared...they are ours to take
Without chance to escape...
How poetic and yet so beautiful
Full of grief ...
How poetic and never merciful
Without chance to escape...
All people I ever
of goodbyeyour eyes
are painted with the saddest
I have ever seen
with the shade of sunset
and its tangerine gleam
those eyes, my love
are painted with
the colour of
Sleeping VolcanoWhen you kiss me
thousand little needles
pierce my skin
delight and pain
both burning calmly
like sleeping volcano
slowly consumed by
heat and fire
and I bleed
poison and nectar
embraced by your need
and even if
we grow distant and old
fire burns out and lava turns to stone
my blood keeps
screaming for your lips
Porcelain BoyIn the corner of my sleepless eye
porcelain boy swallows his muted cry
as he stands
as he hides
one with restless shadows
one with helpless sorrows
night after nigh
one inflamed twilight after another
between sunset and dusk
on the edge of summer storm and thunder
Silent porcelain boy
beautiful and young, blue-eyed and fair
though paler than graveyard misty air
brings me peace and joy
my twilight love and toy
I am used to see you
I am used to watch you
haunting my night-time tired hour
with your gaze so broken and sour
In the corner of my sleepless eye
porcelain boy with cracks on his face
follows my shadow as I walk by
oh love, what a silent word-less chase
oh my sweet joy and toy
sweet porcelain boy
even your eyes are blank and still
even your lips are broken and grim
I know he´s not real
he does not live
he does not feel
but still he stands
and still he hides
in the corner of my sleepless eyes
made of porcelain and gr
Soul Mate StarlightLong have I loved,
Even though I know not why.
My heart continually yearns for you.
Strangers yet to meet,
I care more about you than anyone.
Listening to the night sky sing it’s lonely song,
I am touched by the purity of starlight.
I wonder what it will be like,
To touch your heart.
Share my scars.
Share my heart.
Believe in me,
And never stop.
Songs flow outward,
Drifting across the night sky.
It seems the only time my dreams are real.
The only time you are real.
I know someday you will grant my wish,
But is it possible for me to grant yours?
Can we share a common path?
Or are we doomed to pass in shadows?
A rose for his freedom(French version below)
Last member of a decimated lineage, gangrenous
He assisted his relative till the end of the road
Himself imprinted all his life with this fatality.
From the unreachable sky fall feathers of grief;
His weary soul takes his ultimate breath, hollow and heavy
As a grave. Finding his new cage forever.
The last whisper of this redbreast without wings.
On this funeral granite, a dropped rose;
His dreamed freedom, late, cruel
Only the cradle of Death was able to give it to him.
Une rose pour sa liberté
Dernier membre d'une lignée décimée, gangrenée
Il assista les siens jusqu'au bout du chemin,
Lui-même empreint à vie de cette fatalité.
Du ciel inaccessible tombent des plumes de chagrin ;
Son âme lasse pousse son ultime souffle, creux et lourd
Comme une tombe. Trouvant sa nouvelle cage pour toujours.
Le dernier murmure de ce rouge-gorge sans ailes.
Sur ce granit funéraire, une
Beautifully BrokenA tidal wave crashes
Hard against the front of my skull,
Spewing fountains of hate into the air.
They are not beautiful.
A shot glass in one hand,
A pen in the other,
I drink alone in my room
As everything about me falls apart.
I can't heal mistakes.
The higher I am,
The prettier the fountains become,
But they really still look the same.
The world sees such strength,
A stoic warrior in a landscape of corruption,
But inside is a black, charred heart,
Shrouded in secrecy.
I am not beautiful,
Because hate is not beautiful.
x.i want your ghost
to haunt me,
every memory of you.
let them flood me
and drag me down;
drown me in your
fill my lungs,
i'll take the pain
at least you gave me
Little BrothersMy brother wanted to die today
He told me so himself
He cried and said that he was done
With his life, this living hell
I never said a single word,
Just held him and his tears
Told him it would be alright
That I wanted him here
My brother's in the ER today.
Doctor said he swallowed pills.
Now I cried and asked him why
His pained gaze gave me chills.
We never told mom or dad
It was our secret
I picked him up and drove him home
We said we'd always keep it.
My little brother is dead today
I found the toppled chair and rope
He was only twelve years old
Far too young to have no hope
It was all my fault, you know
I always shut my mouth
Never told a single soul
His mentality was headed south
My baby brother is dead and gone
Because of my mistake
I should have spoken up
This was not his fate.
For all the friends and family out there
Who've had someone like him
Please, please tell someone now
Or face what could have been.
Lost in Your AbsencePorcelain heart chipped,
You, never my whole world;
Yet your absence, my chaos;
Everything was out of balance.
You got away, my mind fleeted,
Tight clench of my heart;
Felt like a heart attack,
A part of me went missing.
I was once a ghost,
Invisible, walked through me;
You brought me my presence,
I'll smile, only for you.
I'll chase you if I could,
I'll give everything up if I could,
but you'll give me your sweetest smile and backed away,
leaving me alone, grieving for you.
-Lost in Your Absence
Reflection of SorrowReflection of Sorrow 1/1/14
I love the way you look at the stars.
I see their reflection in your eyes.
I'll place their dust in fragile jars
and memorize your silent sighs.
Please sweet one - do not cry.
The past cannot hurt you this way.
Give me all your pain and I'll try
to keep your demons at bay.
We feel so small as we gaze
at this vast universe in a haze.
I want you always right beside me
as we face our fears repeatedly.
And should you ever walk away
and leave me here alone.
I'll never see a bright day
or recall the moon that shone.
Do you remember the blazing fire that night?
Can you call to mind the stars intense light?
I swear the moon was bigger then.
I wish I could go back there again
And somehow say the right things.
Then I wouldn't break your fragile wings.
I'll never forget the feeling I felt.
Now I am suffering the pain that I dealt!
saturday night.last night i found you
lying beneath the stars,
the rain had washed the dirt
out of your grave.
Foolish Enough To Be LovedI'd dig into my wounds
just to make you stay,
cough up my self-inflicting wishes
to have your arms locked around me forever,
because your departures poison my thoughts.
I want to claw my eyes out,
disease my lips &
rip off my ears,
because your existence
will be the death
of me if i ever see
A void within meAlone on this inhospitable night, once again
I let my memories guide my lost steps,
Wandering amid the ghosts of my past.
As I walk along the quay,
I stare at the feeble Seine flowing:
She's dying by the street lamps' hands
While the whole city asphyxiates.
Reflecting my own lack of humanity
Over the river's lighted surface,
Griefs come and go at the water's rhythm.
Once again, on this breathtaking night,
My feelings are sealed and my chest hollow.
Purple rain, chills of cold.... Or regret? I crave
My musical drug, my remaining salvation,
Spreading a sweet poison within me and
Eroding the remaining happiness I still have.
I plug my headphones...
A grin of relief appears on my weary face,
I flee to lenient lands, where a familiar Angel tucks me in.
These notes of violin split the immutable silence,
Fill the hole in, lit a bonfire to my soul.
This mermaid sings my dreams to me,
Flawed Canvas.Your lips
all across my heart.
My blood isn't even
its a pale and dying
that bleeds onto the floor
and paints a picture
OsteophilicHe loved his bones.
The way they never asked too much of him
or protested his requests.
There was nothing superfluous in their design;
simple, sleek, and uncomplicated.
They were spry, robust
ready to take on the world with
sharp and fluid motions.
His bones were not brittle like she was.
Not so breakable or frail,
not so expendable.
They didn't bend under pressure
or fracture under stress.
He loved his bones -
their ivory purity eased his soul -
and he was proud of the way
they held everything together
She knew one day he'd stomp this
old flame out, long before 'death do us part.'
Cremation had never been part of the plan.
midnights always last longer than they should.i spend sleepless nights in my room
staring at your picture on my mirror
and wondering why on earth someone as beautiful as you
would ever love someone like me,
but then i remember
distilled.and i just can't get over the fact
of how much you taste like whiskey
drenched in rain.
you're bitter and sharp and snide and wild
and i know just how far i should run away
and erase those periwinkle eyes,
but all i want to do is stand outside with you
at 3 am